The Lie of Inevitable

To say that cleaning is my top priority in life would be a gross exaggeration blatant lie.

Yes, I know how to wield a mop; I’m just not willing to accept the battle of the floor to begin with. And I’m no stranger to dirty dishes…in fact, the longer they sit on my counter, the more inclined I am to see them as long-term friends rather than drop-in acquaintances.

Still, I always manage to maneuver this area of weakness into the best possible light, like so many instagram pictures that look blemish free with just the right filter.

“I’m a creative!” I say. “I can clean OR I can write, but CLEARLY I can’t be expected to do both!”

“I’m just not a ‘neat freak’. I don’t feel the need to succumb to ‘normal social expectations’ of what constitutes a ‘clean’ house. What does someone with a breathable kitchen space and non-molding bathroom have that I don’t have?”

(Please don’t answer that question.)

But over the Christmas break I was talking to my husband about a dream of mine, and he very gently asked me if I thought I was prepared for that dream. He brought up some important things around the house that he felt we were struggling to accomplish currently (read: my nemesis, the dishes, among other things). He sometimes felt like we were playing a game of survival rather than offense; were we prepared for something new and time consuming in light of the sticky mounds of evidence on my counter that seemed to suggest the opposite?

My response to him was the first time I was honest with myself on the issue: “I COULD keep the kitchen clean if I wanted to.”

I lived like a dirty kitchen was an inevitable fact of my life, like gravity or stretch marks.

Inevitable things aren’t worth fighting against. So I didn’t.

But when I saw those dirty dishes as part of an OBSTACLE to a larger, freer life- a barrier to my God-dream- suddenly the lie of inevitable popped right in my face.

So I’m confessing to you that these last 10 days of January, I have actually kept up with my dirty dishes. I haven’t tackled a routine for mopping the floor, and I’ve definitely gone to bed with lingering unwashed dishes. But I’m finding that I actually CAN maintain my kitchen- and that it has benefits I never knew.

I feel less overwhelmed because my dishes don’t pile up like before. I can think more clearly. (Seriously.) Plus, the kitchen is the first room my husband sees when he comes home from work; I give him a gift of lower stress and chaos simply by making dishes a priority.

And most freeing of all: I’m beginning to recognizing other places where I’ve believed the lie inevitable.

God has shown me recently that the enemy of my soul loves for me to believe in the lie of inevitable. The enemy wants to keep me stuck, helpless, and ineffective, and he can do that very simply by getting me to believe that the BATTLE ISN’T WORTH THE FIGHT.

Because why would I fight a battle I can’t win?

And God is reminding me that He has WON THE BATTLE AND THE WAR and that God alone gets to define the inevitable for me. If God is calling me and you into a battle, we can rest assured it won’t be one He doesn’t intend for us to conquer in His strength.

On a more serious level, beyond dirty dishes, I’ve been struggling with a cycle of anger that has been pervasive in my home. It’s not always the explosive kind, but I’ve noticed patterns developing in my reaction to my kids and in their reaction to each other and to us as parents.

And the enemy has been whispering to me, “This anger is inevitable. You can survive it…maybe. You can react to it. But you’ll never beat it. So why fight for peace in your home? Why ask God to give you self-control or gentle answers? You can’t beat this thing…you let it go too long…you can’t change it now. It’s inevitable.”

And God is showing me that this. is. not. true. God is allowing me to get just righteously angry enough at the enemy for using this to keep me stuck and living anything LESS than the full life God wants for me, my husband and kids.

So I’m starting where I know…and I’m praying. And just like starting with a few extra minutes of dishes a day has already had huge results, I’m trusting that each baby step I take towards God and His peace will have the same beautiful outcome. I’m trusting that God has given me the armor to fight this battle and He has not left me to fight alone.

Anger can destroy and undermine. Anger feels huge and overwhelming. But anger is not inevitable.

And now I’m ready for the fight.

Sometimes we start out our new year ready to take life by the horns and we fail quickly. Sometimes that’s because we try to bite off more than we can chew and we burn out fast. Other times, I think it’s because we believe this lie that we simply can’t change.

It’s OK if we aren’t perfect. But I challenge you today to allow God to paint a picture in your life of what could be if you stopped wallowing in the lie of “inevitable” in your life. What could you be free from? What might God want to birth in that space of surrender to Him? What God-dream could you chase if you weren’t tangled to the chaos and clutter of lies that hold you back?

If you have a story of how God exchanged lies in your life for His passion and freedom, I hope you’ll share with us here to inspire us all on our journey to live more fully in 2019.